BUTTERCUPS AND GOLF BALLS
Towards the end of a round of golf , Dave hit his ball into the woods and found it in a patch of pretty, yellow buttercups.
Trying to get his ball back into play, he ended up thrashing just about every buttercup in the patch.
All of a sudden POOF!!
In a flash and puff of smoke a little old woman appeared.
She said "I'm Mother Nature! Do you know how long it took me to make those buttercups?! Just for doing what you've done you won't have any more butter for your popcorn for the rest of your life... better still you won't have any butter for your toast for the rest of your life... as a matter of fact you won't have any butter for anything for the rest of your life!"
Then POOF!! She was gone!
After Dave recovered from his shock he hollered for his friend "Fred! Where are you?!"
Fred yells back "I'm over here, in the pussy willows."
Dave shouts back "Don't swing Fred! For the love of God DON'T SWING!!"