I still don't think I've got them, its all still a bit jumbled, but I need to get this out of my head so please bear with me...
Planner. Procrastinator. Both words fit me, in a weird contradictory sort of way. I make plans, I make lists. But I put things off to the last minute, or beyond.
(let us not even go into the "how's the packing for the big move going?" lol)Seems there's always some sort of excuse. Even with all that I try to be there for life as it happens. To live for the moment. To appreciate what I have while I have it. To enjoy what I'm doing while I do it. To be thankful for those in my life while we're together. But I know I can do better at that... and I need to make it a priority.
Horses can be a dangerous hobby/career. (hang on this does tie together) We can try to make things as safe as we can but "stuff" can still happen.
I spend a good chunk of my time disagreeing with my in-laws about this. They really don't think being involved with horses is a good thing. They'd love it if we sold all the horses. They just think about the dangers.
My usual reply is that I could just as likely trip on the stairs and break my neck as get hurt with my horses. That I HAVE been hurt, and worse, in car accidents than in any of my horse accidents. Does that mean I should never get in a car again? Ah-ha but I could get hit crossing the street if I was a pedestrian!
The truth is I have never pictured my life without horses in it in some way. And I am thankful for horses... but the risk involved is there and not to be ignored.
Sunday morning a friend/acquaintance of mine lost her mother in a wreck. Long story short she was driving a team, one horse spooked, equipment broke, the team bolted and Mrs. K fell out of the wagon and broke her neck.
A freak accident and a mother lost her mother on Mother's Day.
Then I found out that the day before, Saturday, a lady I barrel race with had a freak accident roping. She had just dallied on and her horse took a bad step and flipped. She was thrown clear but the momentum of the steer pulled hard enough on the rope that her horse got pulled over and onto her as it was tumbling. He crushed her into the ground resulting in broken bones and head injuries. She was taken to the hospital and admitted as a trauma. Up until Tuesday every time she stood up she'd get dizzy and/or pass out. (that could still be happening I haven't gotten any news past Tuesday evening)
It was another freak accident, she was on her good ole broke horse, not one of her colts. And she's lucky. If it had not been for where she landed she would have been hurt a LOT worse. The ground was freshly worked and fairly deep so it cushioned her as Dez rolled onto her, in fact there was a hollow in the ground shaped like her when the ambulance took her away.
We all hear of stories like these. Or have experienced them or bore witness to them ourselves. Does that mean we stop being horsepeople?
Well for some of us that answer is yes. For others it means we consider it. I for one have been haunted by these two stories the last few days.
Yesterday I went for a nice ride on Applejack and felt the sun beaming down on me, the breeze caressing my cheek and the ever so sweet smell of a sun warmed horse. And for me the answer is no. At this time I still cannot see myself without horses. I plan on trying to appreciate ALL I can squeeze out of every day and enjoy life and my friends and family while I can.
Don't wait to tell your loved ones you love them (I'm so glad for C's sake that she had already called her mom and told her "Happy Mother's day mom I love you" before the accident)
Don't put off vacations/trips/whatever it is you want...
Sadly tomorrow doesn't always come.
My thoughts and prayers are with both my friends and their families that I mentioned above as they struggle through this time of grief and healing.